Monday, October 5, 2009

Hi, my name is Benji, and I'm an addict.

Group: Hi, Benji!
Benji: Well, I'm 17 months old, and I already have two addictions.
Group member # 1: Go ahead, Benji, we won't judge you.
Benji: Well, I'm addicted to trash and to making messes. The trash cans and recycling bins are like magnets to me. I'm just drawn to them; I can't help it. I love to take things out of the trash and throw them on the ground, like raw chicken fat that my mommy threw away, or a sticky yogurt container, or soda can. And if there's any drops of soda left in the can, I like to dump it out on the floor too.
(pause)
Group member # 2: Go on, Benji. This is good for you. Get it all out.
Benji: I also love to put non-trash items into the trash. Like my brother's shoe, my mommy's mascara and lip gloss, nail clippers, toy balls, magnets from the fridge, socks, pajama pants, cups, toy robots, and spoons. My mommy gets very upset, but I just can't seem to stop myself. I get such a rush from putting things in the trash can! I sometimes clap for myself and say "Yay" after I put a new item in the trash. (sob)
Group member # 3: Don't worry; crying is good for you.
Benji: My other addiction is making messes. I like to destroy entire areas of the house. I'm like a tornado. My parents sometimes call me the Benjmanian Devil. I like to open drawers and take literally everything out of them. I like to carry some of the items to other random parts of the house and leave them under strange places for my mommy to find later. I like to take Daddy's books down from the shelf and scatter them on the floor. I like to take all the markers and stamps out of the craft drawer and chew on the stamps so that my mouth turns pink or blue. I like to take all the rubber bands from the bag and make it rain rubber bands in the living room. I like to throw my food on the floor when I eat, and drip water or juice out of my cup onto the carpet. I also recently realized that I love to drink liquids from my cup, then spit it out on my shirt. And I like to flush the toilet unnecessarily and then clap for myself.
(pause)
And I like to find the marshmallows and the fruit snacks in the pantry, carry them to my mommy, and whine and cry for her to give some to me.
(pause)
Group leader: Is that everything, Benji?
Benji: No, I could go on, but I think you get the idea.
Group leader: We do. Thank you for sharing, Benji.
Group: Yes, thank you for sharing.
Group leader: Okay, let's close our meeting. Lord, grant me the serenity...

3 comments:

Jessica Rhodes said...

LOL!

Carl and Amber said...

I think out two would have made great partners in crime!

Shonda said...

soo funny Hope. I think Jeremiah is trying to follow in his cousin's footsteps. We have him mostly contained...for now, but once this dude starts walking...we are doomed.

Benji, the first and hardest step is admitting you have a problem. :)