the Drawer of Delayed Dreams

WOW! I haven't blogged in nearly 5 months! Shame on me. Here are a few reasons why:

1. I had a baby. Yeah, you knew that already and I had posted some pictures of her on here, but life with three kiddos is BUSY. Things that used to be priorities simply aren't priorities anymore. I constantly feel behind.

2. We moved. Yeah, you already knew that Chad earned his PhD from UCI (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and after spending 9 months looking for a job and applying at over 100 places, he got a job offer. At Auburn University in Auburn, AL. Anyway, MOVING IS STRESSFUL. Just in case ya didn't know. Packing boxes, changing our address at the post office, seeing people one last time, making phone calls about new insurance and old insurance ... it all took so much time. Then the actual move: we drove one day to the Grand Canyon (8 hours of driving=not a good day), one day in the Grand Canyon, one day to Albequerque, one day to Lubbock (TX), 4 days with Chad's parents, 4 days with my parents, one day to Gulf Port (MS), one day to our new place.

Then, moving in, unpacking, finding friends, getting Ethan in school, etc.

Obviously, I've been busy lately. 'Nuf said.

3. The more time that passed, the more I thought "There's no way I can catch up on everything now. Where do I even begin." And you know me: when I feel overwhelmed, sometimes I can't even start.

4. For awhile, I had this crazy idea that I would like to start a real website. You know, one that was a step up from blogspot. So I thought I wouldn't bother with this one anymore anyway till I was done setting up my new one. My new one would have all kinds of cool links, a list of places to go and things to do in Auburn, a collection of stories about my conversion process, some "diary entries" about the mom life, etc. But, seriously, who am I kidding? I don't have time. I was really excited about the idea for about a week. Then I started stressing about it. And who needs stress. Therefore, I'm going to file that idea away in the Drawer of Delayed Dreams until I have more time. The other things that are in the Drawer of Delayed Dreams are:

a. getting an MFA in creative writing

b. getting published

c. learning how to dance

d. cooking my way through another cookbook

e. getting lots of money so I never have to worry about money again

Aaaah. Someday..........

And now an update on my kids:

Ethan started school! I can't believe he's in kindergarten. Yes, I cried, and yes, it's been a hard adjustment for Benji and me with him being gone 8 hours a day. No, it doesn't make my day easier with him gone; well, except that when he's gone, he's not there to fight with Benji all day, so maybe it does make it easier. Man, those kids are at each other's throats these days! (I just checked out Siblings Without Rivalry from the library, and I'm eating it up).

Ethan is 5 1/2 now, he loves computer games, school, bugging his brother, wrestling with Daddy, and other boy things.

Here's my Ethan

his first day of school pose:

Benji is 3 1/2 and is (mostly) potty trained. Just for the last 2 weeks, he's been going on the carpet a lot. Hmmm... But he poos in the potty, which is amazing! He loves watching tv (don't worry; I limit it!), playing his own version of Chinese Checkers, playing cars and parking garage, playdough, reading Curious George stories, and being with me. He's tall and still super active.

Here's my Benji

before his haircut:

and after his haircut:

Fiona is 8 months. She is crawling! She's been crawling about 2 weeks, and is getting faster and faster. She made her first "cross-house" trip yesterday from one end to the other. She puts everything in her mouth, including

1. bars of soap

2. erasers

3. clothespins

4. toilet paper

5. magazines

6. woodchips

7. a little rubber thing she found on the floor

Talk about worrying about the next thing she'll find and choke on!

She has three teeth now, and eats some baby food. She ate an entire jar of squash yesterday night and a jar of bananas the day before that at lunch. She talks to herself and can even say "mamama," although I don't think she knows that's my name.

Here's my Fifers

Now, besides all the comments about how cute my kids are, I'd like to hear what's in YOUR drawer of delayed dreams?

just for fun

Fabulous recipes!

Sweet potato and brie flatbread

1 pound frozen pizza dough, thawed (I use the whole wheat dough from Trader Joe's)

a little flour or cornmeal for the baking sheet

1 medium sweet potato, peeled and thinly sliced

1/4 red onion, thinly sliced

8 sprigs fresh time, chopped

2 Tbsp olive oil (I think I used a little less and it was plenty!)

2 tsp red wine vinegar

4 oz Brie, sliced (I don't know how many ounces the wedges are at Joe's but one wedge is enough).

Heat oven to 400 (on our Verano oven, 375 is plenty hot). Shape the dough into a large oval and place on a flour-dusted baking sheet. In a medium bowl, toss the sweet potato, onion, thyme, oil, vinegar, and a little salt and pepper. Scatter over the dough. Bake for about 15 minutes till the sweet potatoes are tender. Take out, place the slices of Brie over the top, and return to oven for another 5-10 minutes till potatoes are done and cheese is melted.

And now for dessert...

Flourless Chocolate Cake (WARNING: DUE TO THE SCRUMPTIOUSNESS OF THIS CAKE, YOU MIGHT LOSE YOUR ABILITY TO PORTION-CONTROL)

1 cup (2 sticks) of butter (See, that's why it's so delicious!)

1/4 cup cocoa powder, plus more for the pan

1 1/4 cups heavy cream

8 oz bittersweet chocolate chips

5 eggs

1 cup white sugar

1/4 cup confectioners sugar (optional)

Heat oven to 350. Butter a 9-inch springform cake pan and dust with cocoa powder. In a medium saucepan, heat the butter with 1/4 cup cream over medium-low heat until the butter is melted. Add the chocolate and stir until melted and smooth. Remove from heat.

In a medium bowl, whisk together the eggs, sugar, and cocoa powder; whisk in the chocolate mixture. Transfer the batter to the prepared pan and bake until puffed and set, 35-40 minutes. Let cool in the pan for 1 hour (if you're patient enough to do so; I can never wait more than 15 minutes). Dust the cake with confectioners sugar if you like.

Using an electric mixture, beat the 1 cup of heavy cream with 1 Tbsp white sugar until soft peaks form. Serve the cake with the whipped cream.

Let me know if you try the recipes and if your tastebuds dance as much as mine do when I make them.

Day of Fasting and Prayer for Chad

Chad and I are going to have a day of fasting and prayer this Wednesday for him to find a job. Please join us in praying that God will provide an academic job for Chad by the end of the month, preferably a tenure-track position.

There are several different kinds of fasts: a full fast all day, a 12-hour fast (e.g. 6 am to 6 pm), a fast where you eat one normal meal alongside two small meals or snacks (collations), etc. Since I am nursing, I will be doing a modified fast. If you are not able to fast, consider giving up something that day (coffee, chocolate...)

Pray also for all the unemployed people in our nation who are struggling to find work.

Thank you in advance for joining us in this day of prayer! Together, we will make a loud shout to God to provide something for our family.

Six Confessions ... and an excuse for every single one of them

1. I don't return shopping carts to the cart return unless there's one close to my car. I'm not going to load my kids and the groceries into the car and then walked half a mile to return the cart. It just ain't happenin'. If they want me to put the carts back, they need to make more cart return places in the parking lot.

2. I don't clean out the lint traps in the dryer when my load is finished. There seems to be an unspoken rule in our laundry room that you don't have to clean out the lint trap when your load is done because you've had to clean out someone else's lint before you put your load in. I feel it is unnecessary to clean out lint twice. If everyone started cleaning out their own lint when they're done with their laundry, it would be better. But how to make that happen?

3. I listen to pop music ... that's right, the kind of stuff they play on Kiss FM. Like Justin Beiber, J. Lo, and Katy Perry. Okay, I don't have an excuse for this one.

4. I love to watch shows like E! News and Bridezillas. Chad says they destroy my soul, but they're just so darn entertaining.

5. I pick my nose. Sometimes, you just got to use a finger to get out those pesky boogs when there's not a kleenex within arm's reach.

6. I made a flourless chocolate cake last week and ate a fourth of it in one night. But before you judge, it's not a 9x13 cake; it's made in a springform cake pan, and it's also not very thick, so a fourth is less than you think. But it's still a lot. It's just SO DARN good. It's the best flourless chocolate cake recipe in the world, and it's better than brownies.

If you would like to post a confession here, I'd love to hear it. The juicier and more scandalous, the better!

Sunday Six

1. First of all, I'm really sad that no one commented on the Taco Town video. Does that mean no one watched it? I'm hurt. It's so, so funny. If you haven't watched it yet, do so. If it doesn't make you laugh, you are taking life way too seriously. "TACO TOWN!!!!"

2. Secondly, I know you're all just dying to know what I did with my hair after I wrote the post about what to do. You probably haven't been able to sleep well not knowing the outcome. So I am here to satisfy your curiosity so that you can sleep again. It's not as short or as drastic of a cut as I was hoping for. The guy who cut my hair last time, when I told him I wanted to go short, he laughed and said, "Ha ha ha! No, honey, that will not look good on you." So he cut it a little shorter than my shoulders. That wasn't enough to satisfy my need to be drastic, so I went to Target afterward, bought some dye and went blond. It's still pretty orange, so I need to do it a few more times before it's a better shade.
In fact, yesterday, someone said I look like Queen Elizabeth the 1st as a young-un. What do you think?

3. Next, it's time to check out my mad crocheting skills! When I was 6 or 7 months pregnant, I got the strongest urge to crochet something. So I made this blanket.
I finally finished it just 2 weeks ago.

And here's Fifi making use of it.

4. And here are some more pictures of the angelic child.Isn't she just gorgeous?! Love her eyes!
Here's her Elvis Presley face:

5. The sleep deprivation is finally catching up with me. For the first 5 weeks, I was going on adrenaline and euphoria. Now, I'm SO SLEEPY. It's really hard for me to wake up in the morning, my eyes feel like lead most of the day, I yawn during the most engaging conversations, and the 2-4 pm time is KILLER. I should be going to bed at 8:30 every night, but after the boys are down, that's my chance to get the things done that I didn't get to do during the day, or to relax and watch something with Chad, which I love doing. So, I've been perpetuating the situation by staying up till 10. And this week, I'm on duty, so I've had to stay up late.

But it sure is nice not to have to get up 6 times a night to go to the bathroom like during pregnancy!

6. Now that I have three kids and an infant to hold most of the day and nurse a lot, I feel behind most of the time. I'm having to learn to be okay with never feeling done with my household work. I'm really trying to work on "living with intention instead of in survival mode" (which I read about in this blog post, which really challenged me) and focusing on my children and having fun with them. It's a work in progress.

Speaking of which, it's time to stop blogging and do something with the fam.

venting

Sorry for the bitter edge in today's post, folks, but I need to vent a little. Here are some of the things that I did today:

1. Put away a load of laundry that has been sitting in our room for 3 days

2. Brought in a load of laundry from the dryer that had been sitting there overnight

3. Started one new load of laundry that we created yesterday, partially contributed to by Fiona who wet or pooped on her clothes, blankets, and sling three times yesterday

4. Made the bed so I wouldn't feel that everything was so disorganized

5. Finally ate breakfast

6. Went to a friend's house for a playdate and had a great time

7. Totally overate at friend's house (including on nectarine and blackberry cobbler with a buttery topping), thereby destroying my well-intentioned plan of sticking to weight watchers

8. Came home and nursed baby for the 12th time (okay, okay, I don't know if it was actually 12 times, because I'd lost count by then)

9. Told kids to play computer games while I went upstairs and tried to nap

10. Tried to get Fiona to sleep by nursing again, tried to fall asleep myself

11. Got vomited on by Fiona (and so did the bed)

12. Took a shower holding the baby (not sure how clean I got)

13. Laid down on unmade bed and fell asleep while Benji was fussing downstairs

14. Got up and welcomed a dinner from Jackie (THANK YOU!!!!!!), immediately ate 3 of the brownie bites she brought with the dinner

15. INSTEAD OF CLEANING VOMITY SHEETS, PLAYING WITH THE KIDS, OR ENCOURAGING THEM TO CLEAN UP THE HUGE MESS THEY MADE WHILE I WAS FITFULLY SLEEPING, I sat on the couch and crocheted till Chad came home

16. Put away toys, wiped table from dinner, and cleaned a little in the kitchen while holding a baby

17. Started another two loads of laundry for the sheets and bedspread

18. Wrote this blog post while nursing again